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About Deviant Senior Member TanyaFemale/United Kingdom Groups :iconvanitytheory: VanityTheory
female self-portrait photography
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Deviant for 9 Years
Premium Member 'til Hell freezes over
Statistics 1,439 Deviations 59,147 Comments 666,177 Pageviews

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I feel like I should say something here because I'm hardly ever on dA these days and I don't want to be one of those people who just vanishes without a word. I'm not like OMGLEAVINGFOREVER or anything that dramatic. It's just that other things in my life take up more time and energy so I haven't found myself frequenting these parts so much. I've been on dA for over 9 years and have gone through periods of spending hours every day here and periods of not being here at all. It's just the way things go for me.

I've added a list of links to all the other places me and my work can be found online in my deviantID, so if you'd like to keep in touch those are good places to start. I don't post my personal Facebook anywhere ever and all the stuff I have listed as photography links are specifically photography-related and not really social. My personal Twitter or Tumblr, or Instagram, are good places to find me-being-me, albeit under a different name.

As for my activity on dA, I've disabled everything in my message centre except for the things that can't be disabled. I'm in the process of arranging to hand the groups I admin over to other people. I may still post photography or writing here from time to time, but probably not that much to be honest. I've left my gallery, journal and prints all as they are cause I have no reason to delete or remove anything at this point. If you really want to get hold of me via dA and don't have any other way to contact me, send a note but don't expect a timely reply. My stock account still exists, although I pretty much never log in to it.

As far as life-stuff goes, things are pretty interesting at the moment and are definitely keeping me busy. My husband and I are running an IT business, I'm managing social media and online presence for a local art performance charity and as of February 2015 I'll be working towards a BSc (Hons) in Forensic Psychology. I still take photos, although my health mostly prevents the kind of shoots I used to do, and I still write. I can't imagine that I'll ever stop doing these things.

Much love to everyone on dA who has inspired me, supported me and encouraged me. There will always be a special place in my heart for this site and the people who have made it what it is over the years. It is a truly unique community and an amazing resource. If you have just found your way here, I hope you find what you're looking for.

Don't be a stranger.

:heart:
There will be times when you tell yourself that your tears belong to a film, that a talented director reached behind your eyes and pulled sadness through them. You are only sad because people on a screen are sad and a script writer has enticed you into their world and you have lived as part of it for a little while.

There will be times when you tell yourself that your tears belong to a book, to the last five pages when the character you have fallen in love with finally dies after telling their life story with words that will haunt you and speak through you when you next try to write. You are only sad because you have fallen into someone else’s mind and they have written sad words about sad things.

There will be times when you tell yourself that your tears belong to a television show, that an actor looked into a camera with such expressive eyes that you felt something reach out and tug at your soul for a moment. You are only sad because you have watched another person pretending to be sad and you are allowing yourself to be emotionally manipulated as part of an immersive experience.

There will be times when you tell yourself that your tears belong to a song, that minor keys and mournful voices are calculated to have precisely this effect. You are only sad because a mathematical formula wrapped in musical notes has been designed to carry sadness to you and deliver it in a perfect package.

When you are asked why you are crying, you will manufacture a self-deprecating smile and say “Oh, it’s just this film or this book or this show or this song. It always does this to me. It’s just so well directed or written or played”. You will be believed because these are acceptable reasons to cry and you will not be questioned further, because you are not really sad and you have nothing to explain.

When you cry in a silent room with no screen and no pages, you will hurl words around and they will crash and splinter and shatter against the high stone walls of judgement you built inside and around yourself. You will tell yourself that the ache in your bones and the ache in your mind are not reason enough, that your fear is not justified, that the shuddering steps you take when your body is not strong enough to simply put one foot in front of the other are not enough to cause this frustration.

You are not sad because you have lost something. You are not sad because time has passed and been taken from you. You are not sad. You are not sad. You will tell yourself over and over again that you do not have the right to be sad and you will step out of your silent room and your memories and your wasted wishes and your sentences that run on too long because you have never managed to create a structure for the things that you do not believe you are allowed to feel.

There will be times when you tell yourself that your tears belong to something transitory and shallow because this will be easier to accept. You will learn to avoid silent rooms and lean against walls and never look up. You will split yourself in two. When you speak of honest experience you will speak with the voice of an observer, all analysis and avoidance and projection and empathy, but when you talk of fictional worlds you will allow your voice to crack and fall to a whisper and your breath to catch in your throat.
There Will Be Times When You Tell Yourself
This is copyrighted work and is not
to be published or posted, or in any
way altered or edited by anyone, online
or offline, in any way without permission.





You will be believed because these are acceptable
reasons to cry and you will not be questioned further,
because you are not really sad and you have nothing
to explain...







DecemberBliss.com Creative writing blog

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Nature Draws Lines by RockstarVanity
Nature Draws Lines
All Rights Reserved 02 by RockStock

:bulletred: THIS IS A COPYRIGHTED IMAGE :bulletred:
It is not to be used by anyone, for anything, anywhere, in any form, online
or offline, personally or commercially, digitally or physically, without my
permission.  If you wish to license any of my work for commercial or
personal use, please contact me directly at Tanya@RockstarVanity.com

I don't mind favs without comments :aww:




More beachy textures and transitions on my blog.





:camera: :heart: :star:
Google+ . Twitter . Facebook . Tumblr
Resources . RockstarVanity.com . Blog
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deviantID

RockstarVanity's Profile Picture
RockstarVanity
Tanya
United Kingdom

We do not see things as they are. We see things as we are.
- Anais Nin

MY DEVIANT LIFE
I've been on dA since 2005 and a senior member since 2007. I've been a Community Volunteer twice, first looking after Photography > Horror & Macabre (2008-2010) and more recently Photography > Darkroom (2012-2013). I'm not here very often these days, although I do still submit art occasionally, so here's a list of other places on the net where you can find me and my stuff...

PHOTOGRAPHY
:bulletblack: Official website at RockstarVanity.com
:bulletblack: Photography blog at The RockstarVanity Universe
:bulletblack: Google+ (Tanya Simpson)
:bulletblack: Facebook (RockstarVanity)
:bulletblack: Photography Twitter (RockstarVanity)
:bulletblack: Tumblr (RockstarVanity)

CREATIVE WRITING
:bulletblack: Creative writing blog at DecemberBliss.com

PERSONAL
:bulletblack: Blog about living with M.E. at Momentary Solutions
:bulletblack: Personal Twitter (DecemberBliss)
:bulletblack: Personal Tumblr (missdecemberbliss)
:bulletblack: Instagram (decemberbliss)

FOR YOU
:bulletblack: Tutorials + Resources @ RockStock
:bulletblack: Photo Wallpapers
:bulletblack: Graphical Wallpapers
I feel like I should say something here because I'm hardly ever on dA these days and I don't want to be one of those people who just vanishes without a word. I'm not like OMGLEAVINGFOREVER or anything that dramatic. It's just that other things in my life take up more time and energy so I haven't found myself frequenting these parts so much. I've been on dA for over 9 years and have gone through periods of spending hours every day here and periods of not being here at all. It's just the way things go for me.

I've added a list of links to all the other places me and my work can be found online in my deviantID, so if you'd like to keep in touch those are good places to start. I don't post my personal Facebook anywhere ever and all the stuff I have listed as photography links are specifically photography-related and not really social. My personal Twitter or Tumblr, or Instagram, are good places to find me-being-me, albeit under a different name.

As for my activity on dA, I've disabled everything in my message centre except for the things that can't be disabled. I'm in the process of arranging to hand the groups I admin over to other people. I may still post photography or writing here from time to time, but probably not that much to be honest. I've left my gallery, journal and prints all as they are cause I have no reason to delete or remove anything at this point. If you really want to get hold of me via dA and don't have any other way to contact me, send a note but don't expect a timely reply. My stock account still exists, although I pretty much never log in to it.

As far as life-stuff goes, things are pretty interesting at the moment and are definitely keeping me busy. My husband and I are running an IT business, I'm managing social media and online presence for a local art performance charity and as of February 2015 I'll be working towards a BSc (Hons) in Forensic Psychology. I still take photos, although my health mostly prevents the kind of shoots I used to do, and I still write. I can't imagine that I'll ever stop doing these things.

Much love to everyone on dA who has inspired me, supported me and encouraged me. There will always be a special place in my heart for this site and the people who have made it what it is over the years. It is a truly unique community and an amazing resource. If you have just found your way here, I hope you find what you're looking for.

Don't be a stranger.

:heart:

Deviousness Award

Deviousness Award
`RockstarVanity's gallery is filled with striking, vibrant photography and endless inspiration. Throughout her time as a Community Volunteer, Tanya promoted positivity whilst providing constructive feedback and suggestions from the community. Tanya always goes above and beyond to provide helpful resources and tutorials, not just encouraging you to improve your creativity, but to improve your citizenship within our community too. If you are ever in need of motivation or a friendly nudge of encouragement, `RockstarVanity should be your first deviant to visit. Congratulations, Tanya!
-awarded March 2012

Comments


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:icondarkphreakarts:
Darkphreakarts Featured By Owner Feb 3, 2014  Professional General Artist
Thank you so much for the Llama badge!!!
Reply
:iconbedlamstudios:
Bedlamstudios Featured By Owner Jan 20, 2014  Professional Digital Artist
Much thanks for the Llama! :3
Reply
:iconfassod:
Fassod Featured By Owner Jan 10, 2014  Hobbyist Photographer
Thank you.
Reply
:iconkathrinholzreiter:
kathrinholzreiter Featured By Owner Jan 6, 2014  Hobbyist Photographer
Thanks for the Llama
Reply
:icondragonfuture:
dragonfuture Featured By Owner Jan 5, 2014  Hobbyist Photographer
Thanks for the Llama badge! :heart:
Reply
:iconeintoern:
EintoeRn Featured By Owner Jan 3, 2014  Hobbyist Photographer
:iconllamasniffplz::iconllamasniff2plz::iconllamasniff3plz:
Reply
:iconlingersonlovestreet:
LingersOnLoveStreet Featured By Owner Jan 3, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Thanks a heap for the llama, dollface!
Reply
:iconthelivelydeadlives:
thelivelydeadlives Featured By Owner Jan 3, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Thank you for the llama! I appreciate it greatly.
Reply
:iconsandrapelly:
SandraPelly Featured By Owner Jan 1, 2014  Professional Traditional Artist
Thank you for the llama :heart:
Reply
:iconludwig-lover:
Ludwig-Lover Featured By Owner Jan 1, 2014  Hobbyist Photographer
Thank you so much for the llama! 
Reply
:iconoaklungs:
oaklungs Featured By Owner Jan 1, 2014
thank you kindly for the llama :heart:
Reply
:iconjamieravenheart:
jamieravenheart Featured By Owner Jan 1, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Thanks for the llama
Reply
:iconlokittyl:
LokittyL Featured By Owner Jan 1, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Thanks for the llama c: Little Pixel Heart 
Reply
:iconmaieykio:
Maieykio Featured By Owner Dec 31, 2013   Writer
Thanks so much for the llama!! :la:
:iconhappynewyearplz:
Reply
:iconawsomequa:
AwsomeQua Featured By Owner Dec 31, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
 Thx 4 the llama!!!!!!!!!!!!! Happy New Year!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Reply
:iconmemphis-creasy:
Memphis-Creasy Featured By Owner Dec 31, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
I appreataite the Llama:superman:, but really.
You:meow: helped me understand the ordeal's with the online copyright violations.

SOoh Thank You Tanya! :bow:
Reply
:iconrockstarvanity:
RockstarVanity Featured By Owner Jan 1, 2014
I'm glad to have been able to help. Online copyright violation stuff can be a bit of a nightmare to navigate!
Reply
:iconallisonwonderland111:
AllisonWonderland111 Featured By Owner Dec 31, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
thanks for the llama! ^v^
Reply
:iconwhentearsturnbloody:
whentearsturnbloody Featured By Owner Dec 31, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
thnx for the llama xoxo >.<
Reply
:iconsonikkudrawings:
Sonikkudrawings Featured By Owner Dec 31, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Thanks for the badge, and happy new year!:D
Reply
:iconmisslemons:
MissLemons Featured By Owner Dec 31, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
I like your photography! and Thank u 4 the Llama...an important part of life 
Reply
:iconcosmickat:
CosmicKat Featured By Owner Dec 31, 2013  Professional Artist

thank you!!

romeo and juliet by CosmicKat

Reply
:iconevergen:
EverGen Featured By Owner Dec 31, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Thank you so much for the llama!! :iconsnugplz:
Reply
:iconmissminion:
MissMinion Featured By Owner Dec 31, 2013  Student General Artist
Thanks for the Llama!
Reply
:iconsavaliste:
Savaliste Featured By Owner Dec 23, 2013
Divider - Gingerbread Men by JellosieDivider - Gingerbread Men by Jellosie
Just wanted to come to your page personally and (whether you celebrate it or not..)
wish you a Happy Christmas Merry christmas everybody by MenInASuitcaseand new year! Happy New Year by Web5teR Take care
Reply
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